Lyric provided by www.seekalyric.com

'Twas the night before Christmas
And all through the house
Not a creature was stirring
Well except for Daddy with a computer mouse.

All the stockings were hung by the chimney with care
(What's a chimney ? What are stockings ? I hope they don't,
That one stocking is kind of ugly and dirty
I hope they don't expect Santa to put his hand down there)
In hopes that St. Nicholas soon would be there
(On his rocket-ship because the reindeer I'm not sure,
you know people are shooting a lot of reindeer these days)

Then what to my wondering eyes should appear
But a martin spaceship with martins that look kind of queer

A little old driver, so lively and quick
I knew in a moment it wasn't St. Nick

And more rapid than eagles his spaceship it seemed?
I thought maybe this is either a nightmare or a very strange dream

So up on the house top that spaceship it flew
And I was wondering why it was landing it was kind I felt really confused

You know because of I didn't see the script for the movie I was in
And a I'd been drinking a couple tonics and gin.

Well all of sudden the martins came down the chimney
And they started to look funny at me

And one said lets sing Grand Ma Got Run Over By A Reindeer
And the other 2 they sang kind of weird

Well the next thing I knew it was morning or noon
And I woke up at the bar and it was June

(Laughter) I'm sorry I guess this is,
so
I don't know if this is a good rhyme or not but

Hey Merry Christmas to all
and to all who are listening to the poem that I am making up at I go
May you get a real gift but hey what the heck if you stuck with coal
You can always do an art piece on white paper
And that'll be kind of nifty and dear

Have fun and Keep your day job