[Dave:] I go to the beach to catch a little sun.
You see me before I get a chance to run.
You ask me,
[Rob:] Dave, where have you been?
How come I only get your phone machine?
[Dave:] The answer should be obvious to anyone.

[Rob:] I told you more times than I care to recall
I'd get more reaction talking to a wall.
[Dave:] It's no crime to be dumb
Just don't parade it for everyone
And act like you're such a goddamn know-it at
You know-nothing-at-all.

[Rob:] Your friends call you "shit-for-brains"
You're full of shit, that might explain
But I think it's even less your head contains.

[Rob:] I go to the beach to catch a little sun.
[Dave:] You see me before I get a chance to run
[Rob:] I only feel contempt for you,
You and your room temperature I.Q.
[Dave:] Well look at you - you're just a big black hole of fun

[Rob:] You need a brainscan to convince me you're not dead.
[Dave:] You need a brainscan and hope they learn to transplant a head.
[Both:]Brainscan! Brainscan!
I don't know how - how you survive,
I don't know how - how you survive,
I don't know how you -
You're alive.