Wan'na tell you all a story 'bout a Harper Valley widowed wife,
Who had a teenage daughter who attended Harper Valley Jr. High;
Well her daughter came home one afternoon, and didn't even stop to play;
And she said"Mom I got a note here from the Harper Valley P.T.A."

Well the note said "Mrs Johnson, you're wearing your dresses way too high;
And it's reported you've been drinkin' and a-runnin' round with men & going wild
And we don't believe you oughta be a-bringin' up your little girl this way."
And it was signed by the secretary, Harper Valley P.T.A.

Well it happened that the P.T.A was gon'na meet that very afternoon;
And they were sure surprised when Mrs. Johnson wore her mini-skirt into the room!
Then as she walked up to the blackboard, I can still recall the words she had to say.
She said "I'd like to address this meeting of the Harper Valley P.T.A."

"Well, there's Bobby Taylor sittin' there, and seven times he's asked me for a date;
And Mrs. Taylor sure seems to use a lotta' ice whenever he's away;
And Mr. Baker; can you tell us why your secretary had to leave this town?
And shouldn't widow Jones be told to keep her window shades all pulled completely down?

Well Mr. Harper couldn't be here, cause he stayed too long at Kelly's Bar again;
And if you smell Shirley Thompson's breath, you'll find she's had a little nip of gin!
Then you have the nerve to tell me, you think that as a mother I'm not fit!
Well, this is just another Peyton Place, and you're all Harper Valley hypocrites!

No; I wouldn't put you on because it really did; it happened just this way;
The day my momma' socked it to the Harper Valley P.T.A.
The day my momma' socked it to the Harper Valley P.T.A!