Chorus
Nan You're a Window Shopper,
Taking a look, But you never buy.
Nan You're a Window Shopper,
You won't pick it up if it's over a fiver.
Nan You're a Window Shopper,
Get On the bus 'coz you still can't drive.
Nan You're a Window Shopper,
Mad as Fuck, Only just alive.

You get up in the morning and you like your tea milky
You fumble for your glasses 'coz without 'em you can't see
It's funny when I come around your house when I'm twenty
And I still have to wear all the presents you sent me.
I walk into your kitchen, everythings got a label
You've done your christmas shopping and we're only in April
And you won't leave your house, unless your wearing your thermals
You're covered all in cat fur and you're stinking like strepsils.

You're headed down the bowls club,
Have another Orange squash.
The Balls are Rollin', rollin', rollin'.
You can't walk right,
'Coz things aren't what they were.
Your ankles are Swolen, swolen, swolen.

Chorus
Nan You're a Window Shopper,
Taking a look, But you never buy.
Nan You're a Window Shopper,
You won't pick it up if it's over a fiver.
Nan You're a Window Shopper,
Get On the bus 'coz you still can't drive.
Nan You're a Window Shopper,
Mad as Fuck, Only just alive.

You're walking down the post office, to pick up your pension,
And then you're off to Bingo, it's become an obsession,
So weary of the kids when their wearing their hoods up,
And even if they smile at you, you think it's a stick up.
You only buy the paper, just to cut out the coupons,
You're saving 50p, but what do you want with tampons.
You're always at the doctors, picking up your prescription,
And they throw in some KY, just to ease up the friction.

You've got a leak in,
Your Calostemy bag,
Yeah it's got a hole in, hole in, hole in.
On the weekend,
You're shopping with your trolley, it's sad
How you're rollin', rollin', rollin'.

Chorus
Nan You're a Window Shopper,
Taking a look, But you never buy.
Nan You're a Window Shopper,
You won't pick it up if it's over a fiver.
Nan You're a Window Shopper,
Get On the bus 'coz you still can't drive.
Nan You're a Window Shopper,
Mad as Fuck, Only just alive