Do a show, save a child
Raise a million bucks that'll last a while
Fight at parties buy a horse
Lose a couple win that big divorce

I wanna be in the headlines
Anything to be in the headlines

Saw my chance, took my break
Took the biggest float in the rose parade
Got jailed, got disgraced
A hundred million people saw my face

Call a conference with the press
Announce my marriage plans in a wedding dress
Climb a building at six-below
On New Years Eve without a stitch of clothes

As long as they spell my name right
I hope they catch my best side

I popped out from a cake
At the president's ball what a big mistake
Fifty guns aimed at me
I was nearly killed but what publicity
Nominated, something big
Stole the hottest scene says the Globe and Tribe
Porno movie comes to light
But I was starving then so that's all right

As long as they spell my name right
I hope they catch my best side
Keep my sidewalk star status bright
(Feel free to walk on me tonight)
Just don't spit on me