Did you know it's scientifically impossible
For Santa Claus to get his sleigh all the way down to your home
The distance from where ever your house is to the North Pole
Could not be traveled in a single night
I really hope you know

And what about all the children that do not have Chimneys
Or the orphans that don't have a home starving out on the streets
Why doesn't precious Santa give a damn about them?
It's probably because he isn't real I'm only saying

And I sing
No, Virginia, There's not a Santa Claus
No, Virginia, There's not a Santa Claus
No, Virginia, There's not a Santa Claus
He's just as made up as your God

No, Virginia, There's not a Santa Claus
No, Virginia, There's not a Santa Claus
No, Virginia, There's not a Santa Claus
He's just as made up as your God

I hope you that Jesus Christ probably wasn't born in a manger
And if he was it sure as hell was not in a December
I mean if that guy is suppose to be middle eastern
Since when can an infant survive such a harsh cold desert winter

You used to hang your stockings up by the chimney with such care
In blind faith that something besides your mom would soon be there
But your parents lied to your ass every night t'was the season
Robbed you of your logic, of your sense, and of your reason

So I'm telling you
No, Virginia, There's not a Santa Claus
No, Virginia, There's not a Santa Claus
No, Virginia, There's not a Santa Claus
He's just as made up as your God

No, Virginia, There's not a Santa Claus
No, Virginia, There's not a Santa Claus
No, Virginia, There's not a Santa Claus
He's just as made up as your God