I asked my baby, my baby elf
a couple questions about myself.
If I was handsome, if I was nice.
I was lookin' for her advice.
She looked at me and shook her head, and this is what she said:
[yelling in elvish]

She yelled so loud, she hurt my ears.
My eyes they welled up, all full of tears!
But I don't mind none, 'cuz she's my elf
My elfity babity boobity babity bubbity elf!

When I go walkin' all by myself
I busy thinkin' about my elf.
I keep her picture up on my shelf.
I'm always dreaimin' about my elf.
I won't forget the way that she
says those words to me.
[screaming in elvish]

Don't know exactly what she said,
just know it kinda hurts my head.
I'll take an asprin, 'cuz she's my elf.
My elfity babity boobity babity bubbity elf!

Leg-o-lamb: Wait a minute! You're not a real elf! You're an elvish impersonator!
You sicken oh deceitful one!
Ear-a-corn: Oh, give the gourd a bow and arrow and he's a real elf!