I'm gonna be hypnotized
To stop me from smoking
Everyone keeps telling me
It's bad for my voice

I'm gonna stay home tonight
So I don't get hungover
Get myself a takeaway
And watch MTV

This is not a confessional song
I'm just singing to myself
My situations didn't leave me strong
Everybody needs a little help

Got myself a little dog (Sasha)
She's eighteen weeks old now
Guess she's just a substitute
But I don't know what for

I was born a Catholic
Poor old Father Delathey
Now I'm on a guilt trip
That I try to suppress

This is not a confessional song (oh oh oh...)
I'm just singing to myself (oh oh oh oh oh...)
My situations didn't leave me strong
Everybody needs a little help

Do do do do do do...
Do do do do do do...
Do do do do do do...
Do do do do do do...

This is not a confessional song (oh oh oh...)
I'm just singing to myself (oh oh oh oh oh...)
My situations didn't leave me strong
Everybody needs a little help

Do do do do do do...
Do do do do do do...
Do do do do do do...
Do do do do do do...

Do do do do do do...
Do do do do do do...
Do do do do do do...
Do do do do do do...