I went out to eat the other night.
Picked up my girl at eight.
In my soup I found a fly. But,
there beyond my plate. Was an eyeball in my martini.
A highball with a twist. One in my linguini,
too. I said, "There's somethin' wrong with this.
" Eyeballs, eyeballs, eyeballs.
Eyeballs everywhere. Eyeballs,
eyeballs, eyeballs. Floating through the air.
We went to the 'musement park.
To ride the Tunnel of Love.
But, when I went to hold her hand.
There was an eyeball in her glove.
We went to Lover's Lane. To skan for U.
F.O.'s. You just imagine what I saw.
When I pulled down her panty hose!
I took my baby home. For a juicy good night kiss.
But there was an eyballs starin' at me.
Between her parted lips. I went to the institute.
And asked the doctor there.
In the department of eyeballs.
"What's this burden that I bear?
" He said, "You ain't crazy.
" He said, "You ain't insane.
" "It's just you got an eyeballs in the center of your brain!"