Take the National Express
When your life's in a mess, it will make you smile..
All human life is here, from the feeble old dear to the screaming child..
From the student who knows, that to have one of those, would be suicide,
To the family man, manhandling the pram with paternal pride

And everybody sings.. Yeah.. uh huh... alright...
we're going where the air, is free...

On the National Express there's a jolly hostess, selling crisps and tea
She'll provide you with drinks and theatrical winks, for a sky high fee..
Mini skirts were in style when she danced down the aisle, back in 63
But it's hard to get by, when your arse is the size of a small country..

And everybody sings.. Yeah.. uh huh.. alright..
we're going where the air, is free...

Tomorrow belongs to me..
When you're sad and feeling blue, with nothing better to do,
just don't sit there feeling stressed
Take a trip on the NATIONAL EXPRESS..
On the National Express..
Let's go!..