We're off on the road to Rhode Island
We're having the time of our lives.

Stewie: Take it dog...

Brian: We're quite a pair of partners,
Just Like Thelma and Louise.
'cept you're not six feet tall
Stewie: Yes and your breasts don't reach your knees.
Brian: Give it time.

We're off on the road to Rhode Island,
We're certainly going in style.

Brian: I'm with an intellectual, who craps inside his pants.
Stewie: How dare you. At least I don't leave urine stains
on all the household plants.
Brian: Oh, pee jokes

We've travelled a bit and we've found,
Like a masochist in Newport we're Rhode Island bound.

Brian: Crazy travel conditions, huh?
Stewie: First class or no class
Brian: Woa, careful with that joke, it's an antique

We're off on the road to Rhode Island
We're not going to stop until we're there (Brian: Maybe for a beer).

Brian: Whatever dangers we may face, we'll never fear or cry
Stewie: That's right, until we're syndicated Fox will never let us die
(Please!)

We're off on the road to Rhode Island,
The home of that old campus swing.

Brian: We may pick up some college girls, and picnic on the grass.
Stewie: We'd tell you more, but we'd have the censors on our ass.
(Yikes!)

We're off on the road to Rhode Island
We certainly do get around.

Like a bunch of renegade pilgrims
Who are thrown out of Plymouth colony.
We're Rhode Island bound.
Or like a group of College Freshmen
who were rejected by Harvard and forced to go to Brown.
We're RHODE ISLAND BOUND
(fades)