You've all been worshipping a false messiah.
I pray to God that I got here in time to guide you.
I came to bring you hope, I came to bring you joy,
So I've got to stay alive and drunk and unemployed.
I¹ve got to stay alive and drunk and unemployed.
I've GOT TO STAY ALIVE AND DRUNK AND UNEMPLOYED!
Here comes the Whiskey Rabbi, Here comes the Whiskey Rabbi.
I came to destroy all the false piety.
Most of all, the false piety of smug sobriety.
I sneak into town, and I¹m gone in a flash,
Spreaking my wisdom around like a rash,
I'm spreading my wisdom around like a rash,
SPREADING MY WISDOM AROUND LIKE A RASH!
Here comes the Whiskey Rabbi, Here comes the Whiskey Rabbi.
Here comes the Whiskey Rabbi, Here comes the Whiskey Rabbi.
I sure hope she's gonna be sympathetic,
'Cause she¹s a hot little Catholic paramedic.
I¹ve got to leave in the morning, 'cause they¹re coming to get me,
But first I need you to aid and abet me.
I need you to aid and abet me. I need you to aid and abet me,
I NEED YOU TO AID AND ABET ME!
Here comes the Whiskey Rabbi, Here comes the Whiskey Rabbi.
Here comes the Whiskey Rabbi, Here comes the Whiskey Rabbi.