I know there's never been a man, in the awful shape I'm in

I can't even spell my name, my head's in such a spin

Today I tried to eat a steak, with a big old table spoon

You got me chasin' rabbits, walkin' on my hands and howlin' at the moon

Well sugar I took one look at you, and it almost drove me mad

And then I even went and lost, what little sense I had

Now I can't tell the day from night, I'm crazy as a loon

You got me chasin' rabbits, pullin' out my hair and howlin' at the moon

Some friends of mine asked me to go, out on a huntin' spree

'Cause there ain't a hound dog in this state that can hold a light to me

I eat three bones for dinner today, then tried to tree a coon

You got me chasin' rabbits, scratchin' fleas and howlin' at the moon

I rode my horse to town today and a gas pump we did pass

I pulled him up and I hollered whoa and said, fill him up with gas

The man picked up a monkey wrench and wham he changed my tune

You got me chasin' rabbits, spittin' out teeth and howlin' at the moon

I never thought in this old world, a fool could fall so hard

But honey baby when I fell, the whole world must have jarred

I think I'd quit my doggish ways, if you take me for your groom

You got me chasin' rabbits, pickin' out rings and howlin' at the moon