Had a crush on Santa
Since I was 9 years old
But Santa why do you go?
Once a year you come visit me
Eat my cookies, leave presents
the same old routine

But now Santa I want something more
No presents are what this girl's asking for
Santa sleep with me tonight.Yeah!

I read these words in her diary
An invasion of my girlfriends privacy
I shouldn't have but I'm glad I did
Wonder what does she see in him
A big old tub of jelly with a double chin
He's older then my grandmother

And this Christmas I really desire
Sexual attraction for this holiday star
I've got a plan that you wouldn't believe
But I gotta act fast.It's Christmas Eve
It's Christmas Eve.It's Christmas Eve

Santa's suit is what I would get
And give my girlfriend a night that she'll never forget
And neither will I
Went through my closet and found a red robe
Made a beard out of cotton stuff
a shirt with pillows
And drove to my girls house

I slipped down the chimny
And to my dismay I saw Santa and her in red lingerie
And in between all the moans and groans
I heard her say
O Santa! O Santa!
She Santa I miss you, I love you
I wish you would stay home forever with me
Santa I knew you were coming to town
But tonight your coming with me
Santa, get off of my girlfriend
get off of my girlfriend
get off of my girlfriend