Last night Ellen bid and made a three no trump
And took a hundred dollars off her friends.
She got a little nest egg when her daddy died
And now they're livin' on the dividends.
Ellen is the chairman of the Children's Fund.
She is the biggest donor, don't you know.
And I recall the day the drinks were on the house
When Ellen finally bet the tennis pro.

But it's a shame about him, it's a shame about him.
Well, he's tryin' so hard and he still just can't win.
It's a shame about him...ah ah ah...Yes, it's a shame about him.

It was back in Eisenhower's secnd term
Before they put old Elvis in a tank.
But Ellen married Bill and Sarah's oldest boy.
The wedding was good news down at the bank.
Bill Junior wasn't half the man his father was,
And he just let the business go to hell.
And if Ellen hadn't waded in and taken charge,
The family would have probably had to sell.

But it's a shame about him, it's a shame about him.
Well, he's tryin' so hard and he still just can't win.
It's a shame about him...ah ah ah...Yes, it's a shame about him.

Well, I just saw Bill Junior in the bank today.
He's put on an awful lot of weight.
He was off to see his lawyer so he couldn't talk.
Already he was half an hour late.
But Marjorie the teller said the rumor is
Ellen told Bill Junior that they were through.
Now watch and see without that man to hold her down,
Well, there is just no tellin' what she'll do.

But it's a shame about him, it's a shame about him.
Well, he's tryin' so hard and he still just can't win.
It's a shame about him...ah ah ah...Yes, it's a shame about him.