Johnny "Guitar" Watson - Telephone Bill Lyrics

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Everybody rappin' and talkin' 'bout nothin'

And makin' 'em sexy sounds

And in the meantime and in between time

I'm down here on the ground

But now I'm not complainin' about what's pertainin'

To my present status quo

About thing's gettin' hard, ooh, my God, inflation

I know you know, listen

Now just yesterday I'd like to say

Before I got out of my bed

Now I was already tired on the for real side

And a few bills I forgot to pay

Now my phone rang and a cute little girl

Began to sing this tune

She said, ?Mr. Watson, I'd like to inform you

Your phone is turned off at noon?

Now that came to me as no surprise

'Cause last week I went up the coast

I met a cute little girl that was all the way live

And callin' her I thought was the most

She had them great big eyes and 'em great big legs

And it gave my body a chill

So you know, I never thought about the cost

And no, a telephone bill

So I just kept on rappin'

My hands got clappin' havin' myself a ball

You know, it slipped my mind

It was at the same time I was makin' a long distance call

So that day before yesterday I ran into the problem

Just makin' them calls and hollers

And I picked up the envelope that contained my bill

Guess what, 500 dollars

Now the next time I call this big leg cutie

To make myself a date

I'm gonna call that girl way after nine

And get me the evenin' rate

Now, I ain't gonna tell her

I ain't tellin' her nothin' to blow my frown thing

But it'll be way, way, way after nine

When she'll hear her telephone ring

Ring it, ring it, ring that telephone

Ring it, ring it, ring that telephone

I said, ring it, ring it, have yourself a thrill

And when you ring it, ring it, watch your phone bill

Now I paid the bill and the deal was real

And my talkin' resumed and all

I said, "From now on, pal

I must stick to my local calls"

Now a few weeks passed and I would just guess

You know what I'm talkin' about?

I say, when I got the bill the figure was so low

I was impressed, knock me out

Now shortly that after somethin' stopped my laughter

I was outside diggin' in the yard

Heard a ding and I heard a dong

It was the phone, ooh, my Lord

Say I dropped my shovel and my body

I leveled and I made me a 100-yard dash

And then I straightened up my clothes

And I blew my nose through a Kleenex in the trash

I composed myself and I picked up the phone

And I was still kinda huffin' and puffin'

And the operator said, ?Would you accept a collect call??

I said, ?Ain't that nothin'??

But I was just cool 'cause you know

I didn't wanna be no fool and see I didn't know who it was

It was the big legged cutie from up off the coast

Tellin' me that she was in love

Now for three whole minutes I planned to talk

Not now you all know I ain't never lied

But in love or not, I planned to stop

When the third minute arrived

I went three minutes past it occurred to me

Ooh, she might talk a week

I said, ?I'm sorry, baby, look, I gotta go?

She was a telephone freak

She said, '?Oh Johnny, talk a little longer

With you I'm so in love"

I said, '?I know where you're comin' from

I can dig it, I gotta go rehearse at the club?

She said, ?Well, if you gotta go rehearse I'll call you later

There's some I gotta tell you what's on my mind?

I said, ?Well, yeah okay, baby

You can call me back anytime after nine?

Ring it, ring it, ring that telephone

Why don't you ring it? Ring it, ring that telephone

And when you ring it, ring it, have yourself a thrill

And ring it, ring it and watch your phone bill

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