Long, white limosine, pulls up to the church.
A sick part of me, wishes it was a hearse.
I didn't get an invitation, but I'm here anyway.
And I dont care, if I'm crashin' their big day.

Well it might not be too Christian of me,
and it might not be too nice,
but I wish we were all just standin' around,
throwin' rocks instead of rice.

Long, white dress;
This must be some kind of joke.
Virgin? Please! She ain't foolin these fools.
If the three of us were on Jerry Springer,
I'd be pullin' her hair.
And I'd kick that lyin' sack of shoulda known better,
in the you- know-where.

Well, it might not be too Christian of me,
and it might not be too nice,
but I wish we were all just standin' around,
throwin' rocks instead of rice.

Well, the vows that they just made,
sounded sweet and sincere.
Place your bet; My money's on less than a year.

Well, it might not be too Christian of me,
and it might not be too nice,
but I wish we were all just standin' around,
throwin' rocks instead of rice.

I wish we were all just standin' around,
throwin rocks instead of rice.
Hey!