Welcome to the family
Hope you have a real good life
With my little sister
Yeah, she'll make a real good wife
Hope you have lots of babies
Hope you get a real good job
Hope you don't mind company
'Cause we'll be here a lot
And brother here's some brotherly advice
If you know what's good for you you'll treak her right ('cause)

[Chorus]
'Cause grandpa's the local sheriff
Yeah he's the judge and the jury too
Uncle Bill's the undertaker, son
He'll dig a hole for you
Cousin Jesse, he's just crazy
He'll fight you just for fun
Mama's got a real bad temper
And Daddy's got a shotgun

Welcome to the family
And this side of the tracks
If you ever leave her
You aint coming back
My nephew Red's a hunter
He's gonna hunt you down
Just like he did the last one
And he still ain't been found
Now I like you just fine, don't get me wrong
But boy take care of her 'cause if you don't

[Chorus x2]

Welcome to the family
Hope you have a real good life
With my little sister
Yeah, she'll make a real good wife