Maybe I will, maybe I won't, maybe I'll do it, maybe I don't
Maybe I feel it, maybe I faint, maybe I am and maybe I ain't.

Remember beans, good for your heart
The more you eat them, the more you're fat
The more you're fat, the better you feel
So eat them beans, beans at every meal.

Masturbation will give you a thrill
The more you beat it, the more you feel
The mere you feel it, the better you like
So beat it, beat it, beat it all the night.

Vomitation is never fun, the more you vomit, the more it runs
The more it runs, the better you feel
That vomitation sure will make you ill.