Twelve years old and addicted to porn.
Noone thought Monica'd marry.
She knew her way around a knife and a fork.

First time I met Chandler I thought he was gay.
But here I am singing on his wedding day
(goes on to saying how he's probably not gay)

Whenever I get married
Guess who won't be asked to sing?
Somebody named Geller
and Somebody else named Bing!

We thought Phoebe would leave
But she just stayed and stayed.
That's right. I'm here all night.
And Chandler will never get---

Now who will perform the ceremony
Who will perform the ceremony?