Blue Cyclone

I woke up in a hospital bed,
Stars a-circlin' around my head,
And a plaster cast on just about every bone.

But the doctor said I'd be just fine,
"These things just take a little time..."
And three weeks later, he let me go back home.

But I laid in bed three weeks just thinkin'
"I believe I coulda took him if I hadn't been drinkin',
So the next time we meet, I won't be on no binge.

"Cause I hadn't been the same since we had that fight,
And I'd see that Cyclone in my dreams at night,
And I won't be satisfied 'til I get revenge..."

Well, the first thing my wife said when I got home
Was, "You'd better leave that Cyclone alone".
She said, "You might not be so lucky next time."

So, I says to her, "Beg your pardon, ma'am,
But it wasn't YOU who got the body slam,"
Then I changed the subject, 'cause I done made up my mind.

Then I called up Bill and told him my plan
And all he said was, "Right on, man!
I'd do the same durn thing if it'd been me.

It all happened so quick when that car door slammed,
It musta broke something, 'cause the door locks jammed.
You was already down, he's gone time I got free."

Bill said, "Since yer thinkin' 'bout takin' him again,
I know two ol' boys who weigh 210.
They'd wade through hell just to fight a circle saw.

They both lift weights, so you know they're mean
And the four of us would make a heck of a team.
We might not win, but we'd durn-sure fight to a draw."

Well, we talked it over, they said they's willin'
They'd stop at nothing, short of killin'.
Said "Hoss, we'll back you as long as you wanna fight."

So I checked around at a few of the bars
And found out where all the wrasslin' stars
Hung out after the matches every Wednesday night.

Well, I got there early the following week,
And found me a table where I could see the street
And waited for the Blue Cyclone to hit the door.

Well, after a while, he finally appeared,
Sat down at the bar, and ordered a beer
And he barely took a sip 'fore I stepped to the middle of the floor.

I yelled, "Hey Cyclone! Remember me?
I'm the guy you put to sleep,
Only this time, you can see I'm not alone. Ha ha.

You see them two big dudes over there?"
The Cyclone looked and said, "Over where?"
And I turned around, and I'm a son of a gun, they was gone!

Then the Cyclone looked at me and grinned
And he said, "Okay punk, here we go again.
It seems to me that some guys never learn."

And then he waded through them tables and chairs,
Put a full-nelson on me, and grabbed my hair,
And when he threw me to the floor, I was starting to get concerned.

Then came a birrage of judo chops
And I was beggin' somebody to call the cops
Before the Cyclone could commit a mortal crime.

I sure breathed a sigh of relief
When I heard them ambulance sirens scream,
'Cause I'd be dead now, if they hadn't gotten there on time.

The next thing I remember, they was carryin' me in
And the doctor said, "Oh no, you again?"
I said, "Doctor, how long you thing it'll be this time?"

He said, "Boy, if you don't leave that Cyclone alone,
One of these days, you ain't goin' home!
You'll need the undertaker's services, not mine."

Blue Cyclone,
He's the meanest rascal the ring has ever known
He'll make you groan, he'll make you moan,
He'll lay you prone and break your bones
Blue Cyclone
The Blue Cyclone