1, 2, 3, 4!
I'm gettin' nuttin' for Christmas
'Cause I ain't been nuttin' but bad

I broke my bat on Johnny's bed
Somebody snitched on me
I hid a frog in sisters bed
Somebody snitched on me
I spilled some ink on mommy's bed
I made Tommy eat a bug
Bought some gum with a penny slug
Somebody snitched on me

[Chorus]
I'm gettin' nuttin' for Christmas
Mommy and daddy are mad
I'm getting nuttin' for Christmas
'Cause I ain't been nuttin' but bad

I won't be seeing Santa Clause
Somebody snitched on me
He won't come visit me because
Somebody snitched on me
Next year I'll be going straight
Next year I'll be good, just wait
I'd start now, but it's to late
Somebody snitched on me

[Chorus]
So, I'm gettin' nuttin' for Christmas
Mommy and daddy are mad
I'm gettin' nuttin' for Christmas
'Cause I ain't been nuttin' but bad

So you better be good whatever you do
'Cause if you're bad, I'm warning you
You'll get nuttin' for Christmas
You'll get nuttin' for Christmas, Nuts!

[Chorus]
I'm gettin' nuttin' for Christmas
Mommy and daddy are mad
I'm gettin' nuttin' for Christmas
'Cause I ain't been nuttin' but bad

'Cause I ain't been nuttin' but bad!

[Matt Thiessen speaking]
"Well I'm getting nuttin' for Christmas because I contributed
to the Green-House Effect
which melts the Polar Ice Caps which melts the North
Pole where Santa Clause lives...he's mad!"

Pbbthh!
STOP!