You know one time I knew a guy called Ralph
Seems like a really long time ago now, but
He was a friend

Well there's guys like Hoyst
That gotta be moist
Girls like Joanna
With a modern day manner
Mamas like Joyce
With her turned up voice
The eyes-apple handles
That taste of a triple banana
Oh, Ralph, give me a spanner
That's what I want

Well, there's guys like Raymond
That gotta be dim
Cats like John
That gotta be dumb
Unlike him
You come in
With the guys that can handle the pace of a young iguana
Please, Ralph, give me a spanner
Come on, Ralph, that's what I want