I'm fucking Matt Damon
She's fucking Matt Damon
I'm sorry but it's true
I'm fucking Matt Damon
She's fucking Matt Damon
I'm not imagining it's you
I'm fucking Matt Damon

On the bed, on the floor
On a towel by the door
In the tub, in the car
Up against the mini-bar

I'm fucking Matt Damon
She's fucking Matt Damon
While you're drinking diet Snapple
I said I'm fucking Matt Damon
She said she's fucking Matt Damon

Hey Jim, don't take it bad
Remember all the good times we had
Like the time we went fishing
And we caught a bunch of fish
Then you puked in the bucket
On the fish that we caught

- Knock knock!
- Who's that knocking at my door?
- Im Fu!
- Im Fu who?
- I'm fucking Matt Damon!
- She's fucking Matt Damon!
- Analyze!

F-U-C-K Matt D-A-M-O-N
I said F-U-C-K Matt D-A-M-O-N

I'm fucking Matt Damon
She's fucking Matt Damon
And you know that I ain't lying
I said I'm fucking Matt Damon
She's fucking Matt Damon
Ask The Insider's Pat O'Brien

Last week when I was playing Scrabble with you online
I was fucking Matt Damon
You went back and forth to do your show and Regis and Kelly's show
She was definitely fucking Matt Damon
When I told you I was fucking Matt Damon
I was fucking Matt Damon

On the bed, on the floor
On a towel by the door
In the tub, in the car
Up against the mini-bar

She's fucking Matt Damon
She's fucking Matt Damon
She's fucking Matt Damon
I love L.A.