I can't carry on

This play is too long

I must be going

Extend my regrets



I gave it my best

But now I'm going

This is too much for me to take

Something tells me that she's faking it



She says she don't care

She wants to be fair

She must be joking

It's simple she said



Let's not lose our head

Tell me she's joking

This is too much for me to take

But somebody isn't faking



Someone's heart is breaking

And if you see her give her my critique

She's a bad little actress



Gets no curtain call

But the worst of all

When the curtain falls

There's no one at the backstage door



I'm more than her friend

'Cause I knew her when

She was no sensation

She's wasting our time



Repeats all her lines

What's her motivation?

Now she won't share her stage with me

Her performance was outrageous



Put me through some changes

So if you see her give her my critique

She's a bad little actress



Her delivery don't come naturally

Anyone could see

She doesn't mean a word she says

Her mascara ran



And the show was panned

But I'm still her biggest fan

So when you see her give her my critique

She's a bad little actress



Gets no curtain call

But the worst of all

When the curtain falls

There's no one at the backstage door